The Emotional Cost of Purchasing a Home – Part Two

24 Jun

I began by detailing the emotional costs of purchasing a home here.

3. Getting Your Hopes Up – The very first co-op that we saw has continued to be our favorite co-op. It’s not the nicest place in the world but it was almost everything we wanted—except there was no washer/dryer on-site.

We were repeatedly told how we could put a w/d in the basement. We were completely fine with this until we brought a plumber and he told us it wasn’t as easy as everyone made it sound and that it would cost thousands of dollars. Without a w/d, there was no reason to pursue the place any further. But in the back of our minds, we are constantly thinking that something will work out along the way and somehow we will get this place.

4. Seeing Tons of Places – The obsession begins to grow as soon as you know you’re looking for a place. I find myself on Trulia every day, checking to see if something, anything, has been added. Every weekend we are checking for open houses and attending them if they are within our price range. We call to make appointments to see listings. You begin to see place after place as almost the same. It starts to get emotionally draining looking for something—perhaps something you just can’t quite find. When you find yourself on Trulia everyday, you find yourself lamenting over the fact that homes you really love are just slightly out of your reach and you feel as though you’ll never get what you want.

5. Heart vs. Logic – Realtors know that purchasing a home is a very emotional decision for most people. They know people will tend to walk into a place and have a visceral reaction of either love or hate. For me, turning off this “heart” button and turning on the “logic” button is a necessary evil. I don’t want to be blinded by the beauty of a unit only to know in a couple of years I might not be able to sell it at all or that I might lose money on the deal.  When I walk into a place, my mind goes into, “Can I fix this? Can I remodel this? Can this go here? Can this go there? Can I make money off of this?” For my husband, he did not think this way when we first started to look at homes but now I think he has started to see the benefit of thinking that way.

Have you ever purchased a home only to find it was an incredibly emotional experience?


2 Responses to “The Emotional Cost of Purchasing a Home – Part Two”

  1. femmefrugality June 25, 2012 at 7:00 pm #

    Good for you for being able to turn that emotional button off! Realtors really do play on your emotions; some I know even pretend to have knowledge they don’t in fact possess. Like, “Oh, you could fix that easy. It’s not very expensive.” They don’t have the know-how to be able to promise that to potential buyers. I think getting your hopes up and then crushed is an integral disappointment in all aspects of life. I try not to get too excited about anything till it’s set in stone…but it’s difficult!

    • thethriftyspendthrift June 25, 2012 at 7:09 pm #

      It is really hard but I think it’s necessary. Whenever someone says something is easily fixable, I take pictures/video and show my dad who, although he isn’t a carpenter, really does know about most of this stuff and has a lot of experience doing it himself.

      The place we really liked with the obnoxious realtor had another open house and I kind of hope no one liked it. At the beginning when we showed interest she was saying things like, “Oh I think I’ll have another offer.” Then as time went on and when it was obvious that she didn’t it changed to, “Oh I don’t think they’ll be approved to the board.” Then there was nothing about him. I think he was just a phantom.

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