Ignoring “Advice” When Buying a Home

16 Jun

My husband and I have been looking at homes. We have had our eye on one particular contender. It’s a two bedroom, one bath co-op in a small unit of cooperative units that look like a row of townhouses—highly unusual in my area since most co-ops look like large apartment buildings. Aside from the stress involved in looking for a home, I have found that people tend to be less than supportive in our attempt to purchase a home. Instead, we end up hearing a stream of opinions from people who know absolutely nothing about our situation and who seem to know little about the housing market today.

Opinion #1: Don’t Buy a Co-Op! Ever!

People fear co-ops for a number of reasons. They do not like that you technically do not own a piece of property. They don’t like the idea of boards and people who can raise your maintenance whenever they want for whatever reason. I am perfectly able to understand where they are coming from and why they feel that way.

What I do not appreciate is when people wholeheartedly try to talk us out of purchasing a co-op. They do not know our situation well enough, financial or otherwise, to make that decision for us.  So many people are ready to talk us out of purchasing a co-op without talking to us first and that is something I do not understand.

Why purchase a co-op? Simply put, that is all we can really afford. Occasionally there is a condo that comes on the market that we can afford but that is very rare. Unlike the neighborhoods many of these people live in, co-ops are actually quite commonplace and regularly bought and sold where we reside.

Opinion #2: Try to Get…

My husband and I have what I consider to be a short list of things we want in a home.

  • Two bedrooms, one bathroom
  • Preferably some type of outdoor space
  • Washer and dryer on-site, not even necessarily in our unit
  • Dishwasher in the co-operative unit
  • Storage or a lot of closet space
  • Some type of parking even if there is a waiting period or lottery

Now some of these things are somewhat flexible. For example, the unit we are interested in doesn’t have a washer, dryer, dishwasher or parking on-site. However, we feel as though we must have the option to add some of these things in the future. Not having a parking space is not the end of the world either—it’s a preference but not necessarily a need.

The naysayers, of course, have to insert their own opinions as to what we should be looking for—why not try to get something with a backyard? Why don’t you get something with a big kitchen? Why don’t you get something that has been renovated? Why are you buying a co-op again?

Opinion #3: Why Don’t You Just Buy a House?

I really hate this question because it assumes that I wouldn’t want to buy a house if I could buy one. Do you think I would be purchasing co-operative units if I could afford a house? What makes you think we can easily afford a house? Do you guys mistakenly think my husband and I are rich? My husband and I would gladly purchase a home if we could afford it. Affordability is key and most of the people telling us this bought houses twenty or thirty years ago when houses were still easily affordable in our city.

What to Take Away

It’s always smart to listen to people in terms of housing, especially when you have never purchased a home before. However, you need to remember that this home is for you and that there is a difference between good advice and opinions from your friends and families. When you begin your search, keep these things in mind:

  • Always ask for advice but make sure your advice is from the right people
  • Before you ask for feedback, make sure whoever you are discussing your situation with has the entire picture
  • Don’t allow other people to push their opinions on you and push you into something you don’t want

How have your home buying endeavors been? How have people responded to what you are looking for when you tell them about it?

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2 Responses to “Ignoring “Advice” When Buying a Home”

  1. thefamilyfinances June 17, 2012 at 3:30 am #

    We bought our house in 2008. I don’t really recall a lot of people giving us advice on it, though. We knew what we wanted and our price range, and we did our thing. I don’t really know much about housing co-ops, so I can’t give you much advice. Is it a lot different than buying a house?

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